Obedience to what extent?

Question:

salam
To what extent does the wife have to obey the husband? If the husband is controlling in too many aspects of the wife’s choices, meaning he doesn’t give her a choice in what books she can read, how to sleep, how to eat, how to walk, how to clean, which shaykhs to listen to…does she have to obey in every single issue?

Secondly, do I have ijaaza/permission to read materials from Rumi like the Mathnawi. I have basic aqeeda, fiqh/fard ain

Answer:

wa `alaykum salam,

Give your husband a little benefit by obeying him. As long as what he wishes does not contravene the religious tenets and duties, or acts that are commendable in religion, it becomes incumbent for the wife to follow for her spiritual benefit. You also can discuss with him and look for ways that his wishes become easy for you to follow, and take gradual steps wherever you can.

Yes, you may read from Rumi. When in doubt, ask your Shaykh.

Abdul Shakur

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