I hope all of you are blessed by the greatest bounties of Allah inshallah rahman. My question is a problem with my lust. You see Im a 19 yr old that goes to college in New york, you can imagine its very hard to keep your lust down without fasting. And lately its been geting to me too much so much to the point I fear losing my virginity or commiting any form of fornication. By this way I want to fast but my parents will have a problem with that and complain about me fasting and getting weak despite its benefits. So would it be possilbe for me to disobey my parents in this case that I can save myself from such a sin?
wa `alaykum salam,
You don’t have a “problem,” you are just a normal teen-age male. The best for you, as Shaykh Hisham replied to a similar query, is get married, and save yourself from sin, for, as he explained further, “If marriage was half the deen in the past, today it is all of the deen.” This is an exaggerated way of saying that protecting yourself from fornication, by means of marriage, is the only way you can keep from falling into the haram act of zina.
Have a frank discussion with your parents, and ask them if they would prefer you commit fornication or to be in a halal relationship. Even if you marry and your wife stays with her parents and you stay with yours and you meet only on weekends, that is sufficient to save yourself from haram. They brought you to America, now they should realize they are in America and the appropriate way to live in a situation full of temptation.
W ‘Allahu `alam,