I recently took baya and I regret it. After I took baya, I read the Naqshbandi book of practices, and I read that Al-Khidr is part of the chain. I don’t believe it, to me it’s just fairy tales. I don’t believe all insanities about Armageddon, politics. If I knew all that before, I would NEVER had taken baya. I took it because I was pushed by friends. I don’t like Shaykh Nazim, I feel repulsion for him. I DONT believe in this tariqa, so please give me permission to leave and break this bond that poisons me. If you dont allow me to break the baya to Shaykh Nazim, can I leave the tariqa when Shaykh Nazim will pass away? I regret so much having been involved without knowing more it. I am sorry for hurting you by saying that, but I cant go against my feelings.
wa `alaykum salam,
No one can force you to make Bay’ah or leave. However, know that in reality it is the Shaykh who found you and took you into his guidance by that Bay’ah, no matter the circumstances. The Shaykh never leaves his followers, no matter how hard they believe they’ve left him.
Open your mind and heart and give some benefit to whatever you doubt. Should the teachings grant you benefit in this world and success in the Hereafter, then you stand to lose nothing in your journey back to your Lord.