Question:
Salam, Shaykh.
For the past few years my wife wanted to go to school and get a degree for personal fulfilment. I readily agreed. Now, she started insisting that she works outside the home. Alhamdulliah, I have a good job and make more than enough to support the family. I told her that its important for her to be home and teach our girls as they are reaching a critical age (pre-teens) but she keeps telling me that I am trying to ruin her life and controlling her. Even when I asked her and the girls to pray salah, she says I am controlling them and should mind my own business. Basically, she wants to do whatever she wants and I shouldn’t object even if it unreasonable. She hates being dependent on me for anything. All this has been going on for years now. I seek your expert advice.
Answer:
Alaykum Salam,
Continue to use patience and wisdom to preserve harmony. Treat her with kindness even if she does not return it. Increase your daily dhikr and duas asking Allah to solve what you cannot solve, without forcing it. Recite Ya Haleem, Ya Wadud x100 daily. In sha Allah her heart will improve gradually and your daughters will benefit as well.
Hajj Gibril Haddad