Question:
A member of our family who is only 15 is not respecting or obeying his family. He wants to go to night clubs and one night came home drunk and wet himself. What can we do to stop him and to bring him back to the way of Islam insha Allah.
Answer:
The Prophet (s) said, “Who ever saw evil try to change with your hand. If you cannot, change by your tongue. If you cannot, change by your heart,” which means by praying for him.
First of all, he needs to be disciplined and the best discipline is to punish him. Ground him not to go out of the house, don’t give him any money and stop him from school. Now in the West they might say “he has liberty” but culturally, from eastern backgrounds, the culture differs from the West. If you are living in the West, that is something else. Someone in their home country would discipline him very well. If he was in Middle Eastern countries they would even beat him on his feet. Since you are in the West you must not do that. However, if he is the type who listens to advice, advise him first and if not, punish him. You can take away his car keys, his money, his credit cards, his phone or any other means to limit him and punish him. If he still doesn’t listen, then pray for him, and this is lowest of iman, as the Prophet (s) said.
Shaykh Muhammad Hisham Kabbani
