Question:
Assalamu’alaikum,
I wanted to ask a question which is; the hadith of the Prophet p.b.u.h about in this world he loves 3 things. “i.e. woman or women (please correct me if I’m wrong i.e. singular, plural etc,and also the order the 3 things appear in), perfume and coolness of my eyes are in prayer”.
I am assuming, that I can try and follow this as the Prophet (pbuh) stated the above, but I am confused as in what way the Prophet (p.b.u.h.) loved woman or women.
As for my part, I can only hope that I am saved from comitting kaba’ir and falling into sin as my take on it (for myself) may be more based on lust and self-gratification ( I hope Allah protect’s me, please do dua also).
My real question is in what way may the Prophet (Allah knows best, I guess) (p.b.u.h) regarded woman, such that I am perhaps missing the point.
I would be deeply grateful if you could answer this, as I deeply admire this particular hadith of the Prophet (pbuh). I also like the other 2 things, that is perfume, and prayer, but I love woman mostly,and to some extent I would say I am transfixed by them.
If I may also ask a second question with your permission:
That is, I am a married man, and should there be any guilt, in me liking women or other women as the case may be if it is based on higher principles (I look forward to your answer) than ordinary lustful earthly ones.
Jazakallah, khair
A brother who is a Muslim ‘inshallah‘
Answer:
`Alaykum as-Salam,
May Allah Most High take you by the hand to every good here and hereafter.
The hadith does not say that the Prophet, upon him blessings and peace,”loved three things” but rather:
حبِّب إليَّ من دنياكم النساء والطيب ، وجعلت قرة عيني في الصلاة
“Two things of your world were made lovely to me, perfume and women; and the coolness of my eyes is in prayer.”
So the hadith has two halves, the first half is “your world” and the second half is “Allah’s world.” Regarding the first half, the Holy Prophet, upon him blessings and peace, says that he was given a character such as he valued cleanliness, neatness and purity represented by perfume, and on the other hand he prized marriage and sociability with women rather than shunning them, the way other religions look down on women as unspiritual. On the contrary, our Prophet said the best Muslims are those who treat their womenfolk best; i.e. those who beat their wives or disparage women have pagan-like or non-Muslim characters. This is not to say that the Prophet was sensual or was transfixed by women; on the contrary our Mother A`isha, Allah be well-pleased with her, said he possessed full self-control.
Allah Most High said “Beautified for mankind is love of the pleasures from women and offspring, and stored-up heaps of gold and silver, and horses with their marks, and cattle and land. That is the comfort of the life of the world. Allah! With Him is a more excellent abode” (3:14).
There is no end to appetites and we were not created to feed our appetites like animals but to know Allah and go back to Him. The Prophet (s) is teaching us balance and proportion. Hence we are ordered to cast our gaze downward and not dwell on the beauty of the other sex, or indeed of this whole world which is destined to perish. So the prayer is mentioned in the second half of this hadith and described as the “coolness of the eyes of the Prophet” i.e. the recipe for true happiness, lasting peace of mind and the soul’s rest which is an otherworldly value. Hence in another saying the Prophet said: “O Allah! I seek refuge in you from a nafs that is never sated.”
The direction of the hadith and the whole point of the Prophet’s message is: try to be a little less fascinated by this transient world and do not notice it too much; find a way to strengthen your spirit because it is the only eternal part of yourself; the rest will perish.
Hajj Gibril
