Question:
Asalamu alaykum Sayyidi
Is it okay for a Muslim sister to marry a man who is pious but not a Muslim but Christian?
Salam Alaykum
Answer:
wa `alaykum salam,
Bismillahi ‘r-rahmani ‘r-rahim
It is easy to simply say “No” to the question and close the matter. After all, there is consensus in all schools of Islamic Law that a non-Muslim man is not permitted to marry a Muslimah: the only allowable marriage is between a male Muslim and female Muslim. There are many explanations with regards to this stand and we do not intend to repeat them here in a strong manner.
However, assuming the situation is in the West or in a non-Muslim majority environment; and since there tend to be a lot of enquiries about getting married with non-Muslims; perhaps this is where we need to address this matter a little further.
Suppose a Muslimah wishes to marry a non-Muslim man, there are some considerations to note:
1) As a Muslimah, she should know that marriage completes half of faith based on the well-known Hadith. Only a short time ago, Shaykh Hisham mentioned on SufiLive that in our time, marriage would complete our whole faith. Faith is the basis upon which we believe in our Lord Almighty, the Creator and Sustainer, Protector without Partner, who is Allah SWT. It is essential that the basis of the couple’s belief in the same God to allow an enriching life, full of purpose and aim, and the desire to return to Him. Our faith entails the performance of worship, be it the Salah, fasting, Zakah, Hajj, and others like Dhikr etc. These are the building blocks of our faith and both the man and wife must be equal participants in this lifelong endeavour.
2) One of the reasons our beloved Prophet (s) ordered his Ummah to marry is to build families and to fill this world with believers by our children and our children’s children. We need to build each family with as a strong unit based on faith, love, worship, morals. Observing worship especially together as a family is a guarantee of the survival of the marriage and the family. Different beliefs would not teach the same guiding principles to build a family. If a Muslimah does marry a non-Muslim man, that marriage is not valid in Islam and the relationship remains illicit. This will have implications upon her life as a Muslim and also upon her children. Our children are as much a gift as they are a trust upon us from Allah Almighty. Divergent beliefs and worship in a family is a stumbling block to raising our children in Islam. It is our responsibility to instruct them in Islam, raising them as good Muslims.
3) Marriage is to follow the way of Prophets (s), and for us especially the way of our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (s). We claim to believe in him (s) so we should follow his way. To follow his way is following the Sunnah, the Sunnah is Shari`ah, Shari`ah is Islam. To get married, the Nikah (solemnisation according to Shari`ah) is required. It is a binding contract between two faithful persons with responsibilities and rights. The one to receive the Nikah is the husband-to-be when he says (I accept so-daughter of-so as my wife with the Mahr amounting to so-and-so). Amongst the conditions for validity of Nikah is the husband-to-be being a Muslim. This alone would invalidate any potential non-Muslim man into marrying a Muslimah. There is no civil marriage for Muslims.
Marriage is not just about getting a husband or wife, but someone to share your life with, dunya and akhirah. If anyone notices how Mawlana Shaykh Nazim (may Allah grant him long life) and Shaykh Hisham (may Allah grant him long life) conduct the Nikah, they would mention “Do you accept so and so to be your husband/wife, in dunya and akhirah?”. So our spouse in dunya shall be also in Jannah, Insha Allah. Jannah is for believers.
If the man is pious, no matter his religion, then he should (presumably) have a good belief in God, The Creator The Sustainer. Invite him then to Islam and share the wonderful teachings of the Final Messenger (s). His faith will be complete and nurtured under the guidance of the Qur’an and the Sunnah. Offer him the hand of Mawlana Shaykh Nazim al-Haqqani as the living guide who embodies the beautiful teachings of Prophet Muhammad (s) in our time, who will show the right way of living and attaining happiness. He will be within the guarantee and protection under the banner of Prophet Muhammad (s), who is the Seal of Prophets and Final Messenger for all people for all time. He will gain the Shafa`ah, intercession of Prophet Muhammad (s) on Judgment Day, and along with all the Ummah of Prophet Muhammad (s) will enter Jannah with him (s), and that will be a delight and joy for all believers. Remember to always make du`a to Allah to guide his heart to accept His religion.
Do consider these matters upon intent of marriage, Muslim women and men alike. This is an important matter, requiring not only the feeling of love and affection between a man and a woman, but also the maturity and responsibility that come with it.
I pray to Allah that those who are yet to marry shall find a good spouse by Allah’s Support and shower them with His Love in their hearts. May He endow us with beautiful families with upright children who shall be beacons of Truth and Love in the model of Best of Creation (s), his Family, his Companions and the Saints.
W’allahu `alam.
Abdul Shakur Hadi
