Question:
I am a convert studying in Damascus. 2007 I got an offer to marry a Syrian girl. I agreed, but did’t marry, being afraid to marry. She got married but is divorced now. Now I got the offer to marry the same girl. Now I regret that I didn’t marry her 2007 ago, because my love to ALLAH became weak since 2007. I had too much thinking about women and I also lost too much energy during 2007 and asking myself if my studies would have been more blessed if I was married to her 4 years ago. I ask myself if the devil influenced me not marry her. I know a Muslim shoudn’t think like that. But I can’t stop this kind of thinking and it makes me crazy! That means that I don’t trust in ALLAH that He wrote the best for me! How can you help me?
Answer:
Salam `alaykum,
You accepted Islam, you made emigration to a Muslim country and you tasked yourself with the fard of learning, so you do trust in Allah and He has guided you to Him. It has long been the sunnah of the `ulema in Islam to delay marriage until studies are over, so it was not necessarily a mistake to delay it. At the same time your journey is not over, tests continue, and our Master Mawlana Shaykh Nazim stresses that marriage is of paramount importance. Shaykh Hisham even says that in our time it is the whole religion. So marry without delay and do not dwell on thoughts of “if only I had done that” as the Prophet (upon him blessings and peace) said such thoughts are from Shaytan.
Hajj Gibril Haddad
