Question: As salaam alaikum wa rahmatullah,
Beloved Shaykh, I feel shy to trouble you at the present time knowing that you are facing far greater trials than I could bear. However, it my conviction that you are from among the great ones of Allah (‘azza wa jal) and Allah only tests his servants with what they can bear.
I am writing this email with the hope that you might be able to advise me regarding an issue which is causing me great mental distress. Shaykhunaa, I need to know how I can dispel thoughts and suggestions from my mind which I do not want to be there. These are thoughts and suggestions which might appear after having read something regarding a shameful matter or something strange and my mind starts to create images and thoughts, and starts asking me questions like, ‘What if you are like that?’
Shaykhunaa, sometimes these disgusting thoughts and suggestions remain for days and even months. At times I feel like ending my life due to the fear that I may become something like that which has entered my mind. I know that I am not what has entered my mind and I try to ignore the thoughts, but they keep coming back and I even say things (in my mind) like, ‘Your not going to get away that easily!’.
Shaykhunaa, please help me.
Wa salaam alaikum wa rahmatullah
Your sinful student
You and I are students and followers of Mawlana Shaykh Nazim (Allah bless his secret) under Mawlana Shaykh Hisham’s guidance.
Such thoughts also assailed Sahaba after which Prophet (upon him blessings and peace) reassured them that it was a mark of pure iman to feel ashamed or upset at them.
Continue your spiritual duties through worship, dhikr, salawat, group dhikr, rabita, istighfar etc. Love for Mawlana Shaykh Nazim (Allah bless his secret) is paramount and makes everything easy in sha Allah. Regularity is key and in sha Allah you will experience progress.
Hajj Gibril Haddad